There are way too many things going on in my mind that are just intangible ideas that haunt me way too often.
I’m listening to music right now. Korn’s “deep inside” pretty good stuff. my first ever taste of rock music that i was and still am pretty addicted to.
music is like the medication that i prescribe to without medical consent. it’s so sad that my guitar is sitting in my room collecting dust. i really should pick it up again. I found tabs to learn at least 3 different songs I’ve recently had an interest in.
I honestly shouldn’t be on this thing right now. I should be showering and preparing for my day. the same day I have everyday. It’s all so monotonous. BLEH. I need to get out of the house and do something. However, I need money to do this and I am broke as a joke. AHHH.
Now Parkway Drive is on. YES. I saw them at warped tour 2010. What I love about going to concerts is the energy. The pure excitement of everyone enjoying the music just as much as you do. It has to be one of the most amazing feelings in the world. I can only imagine how the band feels. I feel exhilerated. Imagine how intense their emotions are? Probably, most likely, a million times what I feel. That’s probably one of the reasons I’ve always wanted to be a musician or writer. I feel amazing when I write and play music. I feel even better when I get praise for it. Not that I enjoy the attention. Then again, who doesn’t? Anyway, it’s just the feeling knowing that you did something right or someone actually understood what you were saying for once. That’s how I feel when someone reads what I write. I only let people who I really trust read a lot of my deepest thoughts. So those are few and far between. Not even my boyfriend has read my journal. I’m afraid of what he’ll see in me or that he’ll see what I see in everyone else around me.
—Beware: I have so many different streams of thought and will change the subject every so often—
Today will be a day filled with cleaning and getting small necessities for my house. Not my ideal day out in the streets of Houston, but hey at least I’ll see the sun today. Maybe in the metaphorical way as well.
I think that is all for now.
